{"id":71467,"date":"2020-07-17T16:07:03","date_gmt":"2020-07-17T14:07:03","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/imperiumromanum.pl\/?post_type=artykuly&#038;p=71467"},"modified":"2024-04-24T08:49:24","modified_gmt":"2024-04-24T06:49:24","slug":"roman-sense-of-humor","status":"publish","type":"artykuly","link":"https:\/\/imperiumromanum.pl\/en\/article\/roman-sense-of-humor\/","title":{"rendered":"Roman sense of humor"},"content":{"rendered":"<div id=\"ez-toc-container\" class=\"ez-toc-v2_0_88 ez-toc-wrap-left counter-hierarchy ez-toc-counter ez-toc-custom ez-toc-container-direction\">\n<div class=\"ez-toc-title-container\">\n<p class=\"ez-toc-title\" style=\"cursor:inherit\">Chapters<\/p>\n<span class=\"ez-toc-title-toggle\"><\/span><\/div>\n<nav><ul class='ez-toc-list ez-toc-list-level-1 ' ><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-1\" href=\"https:\/\/imperiumromanum.pl\/en\/article\/roman-sense-of-humor\/#philogelos-%e2%80%93-the-oldest-book-of-jokes\" >Philogelos &#8211; the oldest book of jokes<\/a><\/li><\/ul><\/nav><\/div>\n<p>Roman jokes have been preserved mainly due to ancient writers. Many of them were born of real stories, which were mentioned by lawyers like <a href=\"https:\/\/imperiumromanum.pl\/en\/biographies\/cicero\/\">Cicero<\/a>, which is worth adding, over two thousand years ago he was considered a prankster and &#8220;playful&#8221;. <!--more--><\/p>\n<p>According to Cicero, the essence of humour is that it is based on: &#8220;ambiguity, the unexpected, wordplay, understatement, irony, ridicule, silliness, and pratfalls&#8221;. The jokes focused on a selected character type, stereotypes, foreigners, and celebrities who were known in the communities.<\/p>\n<p>One of the oldest jokes that were based on a false story is the one told by <a href=\"https:\/\/imperiumromanum.pl\/biografie\/makrobiusz\/\">Macrobius<\/a>, a Roman writer from the turn of the 4th and 5th centuries CE, in his work <em>Saturnalia<\/em>. The joke itself had certainly appeared before:<\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">Some provincial man has come to Rome, and walking on the streets was drawing everyone&#8217;s attention, being a real double of the emperor Augustus. The emperor, having brought him to the palace, looks at him and then asks:<br \/>\n&#8211; Tell me, young man, did your mother come to Rome anytime?<br \/>\nThe reply was:<br \/>\n&#8211; She never did. But my father frequently was here.<\/p>\n<p class=\"male3\">&#8211; <strong>Macrobius<\/strong>, <em>Saturnalia<\/em>, 2.3<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n    <div class=\"ramka_ze_zdjeciem float-right \"\n         style=\"\">\n\n        <div class=\"zdjecie\">\n            <img\n                class=\"ramka-ze-zdjeciem\"\n                src=\"https:\/\/imperiumromanum.pl\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/08\/Monty-Python-s-Life-of-Br-012-400x240.jpg\"\n                srcset=\"https:\/\/imperiumromanum.pl\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/08\/Monty-Python-s-Life-of-Br-012-400x240.jpg 400w, https:\/\/imperiumromanum.pl\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/08\/Monty-Python-s-Life-of-Br-012.jpg 460w\"                alt=\"A scene from Monty Python: Life of Brian\"\n                width=\"300\"\n                height=\"180\"\n               \n               \n            \/>\n\n            <a href=\"https:\/\/imperiumromanum.pl\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/08\/Monty-Python-s-Life-of-Br-012.jpg\"\n               rel=\"fancybox\"\n               title=\"A scene from &#8220;Monty Python: Life of Brian&#8221;.\">\n                <div class=\"iover\">\n                    <div class=\"zicon\">\n                        <i class=\"fa fa-search-plus\"><\/i>\n                    <\/div>\n                <\/div>\n            <\/a>\n        <\/div>\n\n                    <div class=\"opis\">\n                                A scene from &#8220;Monty Python: Life of Brian&#8221;.            <\/div>\n        \n        \n    <\/div>\n    \n<p>The ambiguity of the joke is visible, for example, in the joke mentioned by Aulus Gellius (2nd century CE):<\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">A man, standing before a censor, is about to testify, whether he has a wife. The censor asks:<br \/>\n-Do you have, in all your honesty, a wife?<br \/>\n-I surely do, but not in all my honesty.<\/p>\n<p class=\"male3\">&#8211; <strong>Aulus Gellius<\/strong>, <em>Noctes Atticae<\/em>, IV.20<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p>Another interesting example dates back to the 1st century BCE from the work of Cicero:<\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">A runner going to participate in the Olympic games had a dream, that he was driving a quadriga. Early in the morning, he goes to a dream interpreter for an explanation. The reply is:<br \/>\n-You will win, that meant the speed and the strength of the horses.<br \/>\nBut, to be sure about this, the runner visits another dream interpreter. This one replies:<br \/>\n-You will lose. Don&#8217;t you understand, that four ones came before you?<\/p>\n<p class=\"male3\">&#8211; <strong>Cicero<\/strong>, <em>De Divinatione<\/em>, II.145<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p>Professor Mary Beard, who deals with the world of ancient Romans, says that the Romans probably laughed like us, like: <em><b>Ha-ha!<\/b><\/em>, <span class=\"underlined\">interestingly they were not smiling<\/span>. We will not find any Latin word for a smile by Romans &#8211; it only appeared later. The professor relies on the claim of the French historian Jacques le Goff that laughter became an invention of the Middle Ages. According to the professor, the very custom of laying jokes and telling jokes is owed by the ancient Greeks and Romans. Those are two cultures that taught us to laugh.<\/p>\n<p>Naturally, in Rome, as well as today, it was not appropriate to make fun of certain social groups or to &#8220;burn&#8221; jokes. For example, the Romans believed that a blind person should not be mocked. Moreover, not all the jokes were funny. Some, as we would call them today, were &#8220;chestnut&#8221;. Some of the historians&#8217; accounts show what could make the ruler laugh:<\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">At one of his more sumptuous banquets he [Caligula] suddenly burst into a fit of laughter, and when the consuls, who were reclining next him, politely inquired at what he was laughing, he replied; &#8220;What do you suppose, except that at a single nod of mine both of you could have your throats cut on the spot?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p class=\"male3\">&#8211; <strong>Suetonius<\/strong>, <em>Caligula<\/em>, 32<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p>Ancient Romans, looking for an opportunity to laugh every day, went to theatres, to watch comedies (for example Plautus) or mimes (for example Publilius Syrus).<\/p>\n<h2><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"philogelos-%e2%80%93-the-oldest-book-of-jokes\"><\/span>Philogelos &#8211; the oldest book of jokes<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p>The oldest, surviving joke book is <b><em>Philogelos<\/em><\/b> (from the Greek &#8220;Funny&#8221;) &#8211; <span class=\"underlined\">a collection of 265 jokes divided into specific fields<\/span> eg: teachers and sages, eggheads and fools or jokers and drunkards. The book was written in Greek in the 4th century CE<sup class=\"footnote\" data-qtip=\"This is how the American scientist William Berg dates the book.\" data-footid=\"1\">1<\/sup> by an anonymous author.<\/p>\n<p class=\"dalej\"><a title=\"The World&#039;s Oldest Joke Book - Jim Bowen Stand-Up\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=LJ0RB38fUeU\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Antique jokes performed by Jim Bowen<\/a><\/p>\n<div class=\"ramka_ze_zdjeciem float-center \"\n         style=\"\">\n\n        <div class=\"zdjecie\">\n            <img\n                class=\"ramka-ze-zdjeciem\"\n                src=\"https:\/\/imperiumromanum.pl\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/08\/smieszek-640x359.jpg\"\n                srcset=\"https:\/\/imperiumromanum.pl\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/08\/smieszek-640x359.jpg 640w, https:\/\/imperiumromanum.pl\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/08\/smieszek-400x224.jpg 400w, https:\/\/imperiumromanum.pl\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/08\/smieszek.jpg 793w\"                alt=\"Frankie Howerd as slave, Lurcio, in the British comedy series Up Pompeii!\"\n                width=\"600\"\n                height=\"337\"\n               \n               \n            \/>\n\n            <a href=\"https:\/\/imperiumromanum.pl\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/08\/smieszek.jpg\" rel=\"fancybox\" title=\"Frankie Howerd as slave, Lurcio, in the British comedy series &#8220;Up Pompeii!&#8221;.\">\n                <div class=\"iover\">\n                    <div class=\"zicon\">\n                        <i class=\"fa fa-search-plus\"><\/i>\n                    <\/div>\n                <\/div>\n            <\/a>\n        <\/div>\n\n                    <div class=\"opis\">\n                                Frankie Howerd as slave, Lurcio, in the British comedy series &#8220;Up Pompeii!&#8221;.            <\/div>\n        \n        \n    <\/div>\n    <br \/>\nSome of the jokes below:<\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#27. A Philosopher, falling sick, had promised to pay the doctor if he recovered. When his wife nagged at him for drinking wine while he had a fever, he said: \u201cDo you want me to get healthy and be forced to pay the doctor?&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#43. When a philosopher was told by someone, \u201cYour beard is now coming in,&#8221; he went to the rear entrance and waited for it. Another philosopher asked what he was doing. Once he heard the whole story, he said: \u201cI\u2019m not surprised that people say we lack common sense. How do you know that it\u2019s not coming in by the other gate?&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#45. A philosopher during the night ravished his grandmother and for this got a beating from his father. He complained: \u201cYou\u2019ve been mounting my mother for a long time, without suffering any consequences from me. And now you\u2019re mad that you found me screwing your mother for the first time ever!&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#51A. A philosopher caught sight of a deep well on his country estate and asked if the water was any good. The farmhands assured him that it was good and that his own parents used to drink from that well. The philosopher expressed his amazement: \u201cHow long were their necks if they could drink from something so deep!&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#51B. A philosopher visiting his country estate asked if the water in a well there was good to drink. He was told that it was good and that his own parents used to drink from the well. The philosopher was amazed: \u201cHow long were their necks, that they could drink from something so deep!&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#53. A philosopher was eating dinner with his father. On the table was large <a href=\"https:\/\/imperiumromanum.pl\/en\/curiosities\/lettuce-roman-way-to-sleep\/\">lettuce<\/a> with many succulent shoots. The philosopher suggested: \u201cFather, you eat the children; I\u2019ll take mother.&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#57. A philosopher got a slave pregnant. At the birth, his father suggested that the child be killed. The philosopher replied: \u201cFirst murder your own children and then tell me to kill mine.&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#64. A philosopher bought a pair of pants. But he could hardly put them on because they were too tight. So he got rid of the hair around his legs.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#69. A philosopher checked in on the parents of a dead classmate. The father was wailing: \u201cO son, you have left me a cripple!&#8221; The mother was crying: \u201cO son, you have taken the light from my eyes!&#8221; Later, the philosopher suggested to his friends: \u201cIf he were guilty of all that, he should have been cremated while still alive.&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#70. A philosopher came to check in on a friend who was seriously ill. When the man\u2019s wife said that he had \u2018departed\u2019, the philosopher replied: \u201cWhen he arrives back, will you tell him that I stopped by?&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#72. A philosopher had been at a wedding reception. As he was leaving, he said: \u201cI pray that you two keep getting married so well.&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#73. The same philosopher said that the tomb of Scribonia was handsome and lavish, but that it had been built on an unhealthy site.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#97. Upon the death of his wife, a philosopher was out shopping for a coffin and got into a big fight over the price. When the salesman swore that he couldn\u2019t sell it for less than fifty thousand, the philosopher said: \u201cSince you\u2019re under an oath, here\u2019s the fifty thousand. But throw in for free a small casket, in case I need it for my son.&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#98. A friend met a philosopher, and said: \u201cCongratulations! You\u2019ve got a baby boy!&#8221; The philosopher replied: \u201cThanks to buddies like you!&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#106. A professional beggar had been letting his girlfriend think that he was rich and of noble birth. Once, when he was getting a handout at the neighbour\u2019s house, he suddenly saw her. He turned around and said: \u201cHave my dinner clothes sent here.&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#107. There was another man, just like the last one \u2013 a big talker, but in fact impoverished. By chance he got sick, and his girlfriend, coming into his place without warning, found him lying on a humble mat made of reeds. Turning over, he claimed that the doctors were responsible: \u201cThe best and most famous doctors in the city ordered me to sleep on a mat like this.&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#114. An Abderite saw a eunuch and asked him how many kids he had. When that guy said that he didn\u2019t have the balls, so as to be able to have children, the Abderite asked<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#115. An Abderite saw a eunuch talking with a woman and asked him if she was his wife. When he replied that eunuchs can\u2019t have wives, the Abderite asked: \u201cSo is she your daughter?&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#116. An Abderite who was a eunuch had the misfortune to develop a hernia.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#252. An unlucky eunuch developed a hernia.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#117. An Abderite shared a mattress with a man who suffered from a hernia. In the night, he got up to relieve himself. When he returned, he accidentally (since it was still dark) stepped right on the spot of the hernia. When the man let out a howl, the Abderite asked: \u201cWhy weren\u2019t you lying down heads-up?&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#123. An Abderite followed custom and cremated his dead father. He ran home and said to his ailing mother: \u201cThere are a few fire-logs still left. If you want to stop suffering, get yourself cremated on them.&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#145. When a jokester who was a shopkeeper found a policeman screwing his wife, he said: \u201cI got something I wasn\u2019t bargaining for.&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#151. When a jokester saw a pimp renting the services of a black prostitute, he said: \u201cWhat\u2019s your rate for the night?<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#151 (bis) A. When a jokester saw an ophthalmologist busy rubbing away on a girl, he said: \u201cWatch out, young man, that you don\u2019t, in healing her sight, ruin her \u2018I'&#8221;.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#151 (bis) B &amp; #260. When a jokester saw an ophthalmologist busy rubbing away on a girl in her prime, he said: \u201cDon\u2019t, in healing her sight, ruin her depths.&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#262. A jokester went abroad; there, he developed a hernia. Coming home, he was asked if he had brought a present back. \u201cNothing for you \u2013 just a headrest for my thighs.&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#263. Someone needled a jokester: \u201cI had your wife, without paying a dime.&#8221; He replied: \u201cIt\u2019s my duty as a husband to couple with such a monstrosity. What made you do it?\u2019<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#159. A Kymean constructed a huge threshing floor and stationed his wife on the opposite end. He asked her if she could see him. When she replied that it was hard for her to see him, he snapped: \u201cThe time will come when I\u2019ll build a threshing floor so big that I won\u2019t be able to see you and you won\u2019t be able to see me.&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#187A. A rude astrologer cast a sick boy\u2019s horoscope. After promising the mother that the child had many years ahead of him, he demanded payment. When she said, \u201cCome tomorrow and I\u2019ll pay you,&#8221; he objected: \u201cBut what if the boy dies during the night and I lose my fee?&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#187B. A rude star-gazer cast a sick boy\u2019s horoscope. After promising the mother that the child had many years ahead of him, he demanded payment. When the mother said, \u201cI\u2019ll pay tomorrow, &#8221; he objected: \u201cBut what if the boy dies during the night? Do I lose my fee?&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#197. An incompetent schoolteacher was asked who the mother of Priam was. Not knowing the answer, he said: \u201cIt\u2019s polite to call her Ma\u2019am.&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#201. A man, just back from a trip abroad, went to an incompetent fortune-teller. He asked about his family, and the fortune-teller replied: \u201cEveryone is fine, especially your father.&#8221; When the man objected that his father had been dead for ten years, the reply came: \u201cYou have no clue who your real father is.&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#202. An incompetent astrologer cast a boy\u2019s horoscope and said: \u201cHe will be a lawyer, then a city official, then a governor.&#8221; But when this child died, the mother confronted the astrologer: \u201cHe\u2019s dead \u2014 the one you said was going to be a lawyer and an official and a governor.&#8221; \u201cBy his holy memory,&#8221; he replied, \u201cif he had lived, he would have been all of those things!&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#204. An incompetent astrologer cast a man\u2019s horoscope and said: \u201cYou are unable to father children.&#8221; When the man objected that he had seven kids, the astrologer replied: \u201cLook after them well.&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#219. A glutton betrothed his daughter to another glutton. Asked what he was giving her as a dowry, he replied: \u201cA house whose windows face the bakery.&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#227A. While a drunkard was imbibing in a tavern, someone approached and told him: \u201cYour wife is dead.&#8221; Taking this in, he said to the bartender: \u201cTime, sir, to mix a drink up from your dark stuff.&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#227B. While a philosopher was imbibing in a tavern, someone approached and told him: \u201cYour wife is dead.&#8221; The philosopher said: \u201cTime, my good man, to mix me some dark wine.&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#232. A man with bad breath, kissing his wife over and over, said: \u201cMy Lady, my Hera, my Aphrodite.&#8221; And she said, turning away: \u201cMy \u2013 o Zeus an ozeus!&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#234. A man with bad breath asked his wife: \u201cMadame, why do you hate me?&#8221; And she said in reply: \u201cBecause you love me.&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#239A. A young actor was loved by two women, one with bad breath and the other with reeking armpits. The first woman said: \u201cGive me a kiss, master.&#8221; And the second: \u201cGive me a hug, master.&#8221; But he declaimed: \u201cAlas, what shall I do? I am torn betwixt two evils!&#8217;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#239B. An actor who was a jokester was loved by two women, one with bad breath and the other with reeking armpits. One said: \u201cGive me a kiss.&#8221; And one said: \u201cGive me a hug.&#8221; But he declaimed: \u201cAlas, what shall I do? I am torn betwixt two evils!&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#244A. A young man said to his libido-driven wife: \u201cWhat should we do, darling? Eat or have sex?&#8221; And she replied: \u201cYou can choose. But there\u2019s not a crumb in the house.&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#244B. A young man said to his libido-driven wife: \u201cWhat should we do, darling? Eat or have sex?&#8221; And she said: \u201cYou can choose. But we don\u2019t have a crumb.&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#245A. A young man invited into his home frisky old women. He said to his servants: \u201cMix a drink for one, and have sex with the other if she wants to.&#8221; The women spoke up as one: \u201cI\u2019m not thirsty.&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#245B. A young man was hosting frisky old women. He said to his slaves: \u201cMix a drink for the one that wants it and have sex with the one who wants that.&#8221; And the women said: \u201cI\u2019m not thirsty.&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#246. A misogynist stood in the marketplace and announced: \u201cI\u2019m putting my wife up for sale, tax-free!&#8221; When people asked him why he said: \u201cSo the authorities will impound her.&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#247A. A misogynist paid his last respects at the tomb of his dead wife. When someone asked him, \u201cWho has gone to rest?,&#8221; he replied: \u201cMe, now that I\u2019m alone.&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#247B. While a misogynist was paying his last respects to his wife, someone asked him: \u201cWho has gone to rest?&#8221; He replied: \u201cMe, now that I\u2019m alone.&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#248A. A misogynist was sick, at death\u2019s door. When his wife said to him, \u201cIf anything bad happens to you, I\u2019ll hang myself,&#8221; he looked up at her and said: \u201cDo me the favor while I\u2019m still alive.&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#248B. When a misogynist took sick and his wife said to him, \u201cIf you die, I\u2019ll hang myself,&#8221; he looked up at her and said: \u201cDo me the favor while I\u2019m still alive.&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#249. A misogynist had a wife who never stopped talking or arguing. When she died, he had her body carried on a shield to the cemetery. When someone noticed this and asked him why he replied: \u201cShe was a fighter.&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#250. A young man was asked whether he took orders from his wife or if she obeyed his every command. He boasted: \u201cMy wife is so afraid of me that if I so much as yawn she shits.&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"center\">\n<p class=\"quote\">#251. The lady of a house had a simple-minded slave. But when she got a peek at just how thick his other head was also, she lusted after him. She put a mask over her face so that he wouldn\u2019t recognize her, and played around with him. Joining her game, he had sex with her. Then, grinning as he usually did, he reported to his master: \u201cSir, sir, I fucked the dancer and the mistress was inside!&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n","protected":false},"featured_media":40123,"template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"kategorie_artykulow":[113],"class_list":["post-71467","artykuly","type-artykuly","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","kategorie_artykulow-society"],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/imperiumromanum.pl\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/artykuly\/71467","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/imperiumromanum.pl\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/artykuly"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/imperiumromanum.pl\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/artykuly"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/imperiumromanum.pl\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/artykuly\/71467\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/imperiumromanum.pl\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/40123"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/imperiumromanum.pl\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=71467"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"kategorie_artykulow","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/imperiumromanum.pl\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/kategorie_artykulow?post=71467"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}